Donna,

There is a big difference between being frugal and being cheap.  The first is virtuous, whereas, the latter is a curse.  I found the way to make sure you appear frugal is to appreciate value in items.  Case in point, twenty six years ago I bought my last handheld calculator.  It cost me over $300 at the time.  To date it still works as the day I received it, even though, I have dropped it, poured coffe into it.  I bought this calculator after my old one gave up the ghost.  That one was not cheap, but it was not durable either.

Yes, I too pick up pennies whenever I do see them.  It is a habit, more than a way to save, but it conveniently takes care of both.  I don't use coupons that much myself.  I do try to pour through the weekly flyers for bargains and buy waht is on sale.  I cook from scratch, I find it tastes better, and I know more what goes in it.

You do need to go easy though.  No one habit must be so great that it overwhelmes one self.

Yo need not boast that you go to thrift stores to buy stuff.  That is nobody's business but yours.  If someone pays you a complement on a dress that you bought at a thrift, just say "Thank you", and no more.  That way, you will appear gracious, nit a cheapskate.  You will feel better about yourself and those around you will take umbrage at your shopping habits.  Hell, let them pay full price at Rodeo Drive.  Someone has to support the economy, so it might as well be them, instead of you, right?

I find being frugal and buying second hand very satisfying, my thinking that to do so is intelligent. Case in point, I found a beautiful Hickey-Freeman suit at my local Goodwill on sale on a rack marked  Sale-All Items $1. I brag about having a $1,000-$1,500 suit for a buck. I've paid $6 for each of my last two suits bought at a consignment stores, with about $25 for alterations to both. I haven't bought a new car since 1974 and believe that the smell of a new car is the most expensive perfume in the world. Let the other guy pay that premium and buy it two years later at a sizeable discount. Though who make fun of frugal people are simply showing their own discomfiture at their lack of wisdom.

I have recenlty became a little more frugal. With a growing child it is the only way to go. At first I would only buy the name brand stuff, but one day I went into a thrift store and saw so much on sale.  I even bought some scrubs for work. (I had been paying aroung $30 a pair and spent less than $5)

I also find freecycle.org very useful.  I had so much stuff left over from my daughter. I just grabbed a bag and stuffed it full along with her swing and car seat and gave it away to a needy single mom.  Oh and then when I went back to school, I posted a list of the books I needed and got most of them for free!!!!!

I still am not good with coupons though.  Maybe someday

I do all the saving such as using coupons ,make inexpensive meals,buy clothes at target,pick up pennies when no one is looking.....       The problem is that with the money saved it goes to the casinos.              

Growing up, Christmas + birthdays were the only times my father used to ever get me things. No allowance either, even though chores I had were equal to growing up on a farm in the "old days", even though we lived in the suburbs. Almost all of my feirnds and even their parents used to find it shocking to them in comaprison. He was always very frugal, and still is most of the time, except when it comes to things he wants, or wants to do, or with who ever the current girl he's with that year. I used to hate it, but now thta I am much older, I do understand it to some degree. From the early teens, I've always worked for most everyting "extra" that I wanted.

Now, I'm a bit the same to some degrees. I will try to save money whenever possible. Wait for things untill I can actually afford them. Unlike him though, the one thing I won't do is be cheap towrds my other family or relatives, as they would do the same, even though most all won't waste their money foolishly, either. I think there's a difference between being stingy and frugal. I pay no atention to anoyone who would criticize being frugal, or utilixing ways to save or even make money. I know too many people that had no choice but to do so, then one day were lucky enough to come into some substantial money, and eneded up blowing it ALL wastefully, when it was the kind of amounts that could have set them up for life, with nice things too, if only they had been smart about how they used that money. They couldn't invest their money, wait a year or 2 to make the money from it, that could have bought that car, house, RV, etc. (paid in full) , from just the interest made, and never would have had to touch the principal invested. Nope, had to go buy it all at once. Then find out one thing or the other wasn't quite what they wanted, so they'd loose a lot selling it, then go right out and buy the next new thing. In less than 5 years, I saw someone take a $650,000 cash settlement (amount clear his end) and blow it all like that. Now has to rent the house he bought for himself just to be able to afford the mortgage on it, and eventually had to sell off all the "toys" because pension and SS weren't enough to live off of.

So, if someone ever says something funny about how or what I do to save money, I just laugh, or if I feel charitable I will take the time to  explain that nice example. I've managed to get and have a lot of things that I've wanted, as time has passed. I just did it smartly and in a way I could afford. And all of my credit cards still keep $0.00 balances since I got them.

Coupons, compost, cooking in blk for pre-leftover-leftovers, and line drying everything...

I recently had a $ conversation w/a friend lamenting her 25k in debt.  I reminded her that I had paid off 18k in four years (03'-07') through frugality...packing lunch, no dinners out, no new clothes, no concerts, only free/thrift/or pot-luck.  She snapped "I know!  You were sooo BORING!!!"  I will continue pinching those pennies, bagging my lunch and dinner and go to sleep with no worries at night - while she'll continue to have an "exciting" debt filled life.  Ho-hum...

Coupons; ".50 off any two xyz. The price of each xyz is 2.00. I should spend 4.00 to save .50? Why not save 2.00...duh. I would not use xyz no. 2 until I was out of xyz no.1 which could range from 5min. to 5weeks. If you fall for "1.00 off when you buy three xyz, now that 1.00 is costing 5.00, and xyz 3 could last 6 mo. to a year.  The MFG co love all the dummys who fall for that. They made their money up front..I'd rather SAVE my money upfront!

I agree with Stoner.

Taking ketchup/mustard/napkins from a restaurant is stealing.  No, the one packet you steal isn't worth that much, but it leads to higher costs for everyone.  Bragging about how you bought a suit for a dollar makes you seem cheap, consumed by money.  Blocking sidewalk traffic to pick up a penny is rude.  Cheaping out on a tip hurts the waiter.  Giving free samples as gifts and accepting gifts that others paid money for isn't frugal - it's miserly.

I agree that people shouldn't disparage frugality that doesn't inconvenience others.  I'm frugal myself!  I never pay retail.  If I get extra ketchup at McD's, I stick it in the fridge.  If I go out to eat, I try to find a coupon -- but I make sure to tip on the full amount.

I once watched a woman gather leftovers from the tables of a fastfood then sit outside feeding it to cats who were homeless themselves. Frugality is just the wise positioning of resources to those who need it most.

boji

First, anyone who does not tip deserves to fry.  And people who walk off with "extras" from fast food places are thieves.

People are crticial of everything I do anyway - my being frugal is just my version of being a drug addict/alcoholic/tramp like they or their family members are.

Now let me go back to reviewing my portfolio and my outline for retiring at 55.

:o-)