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Waiters' top tactics to get bigger tips

Posted Oct 21 2008, 04:32 PM by Karen Datko
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Do you feel warm and fuzzy -- and more generous -- when your waiter draws a smiley face on your check? Do you feel a bond when your server engages you in chitchat? According to Richard at Student Scrooge, these are devices waiters employ to pump up the tip.

When he researched them, Richard said, "I had a whole series of flashbacks to all of these moments at the end of a meal where I undoubtedly was influenced by some of these strategies. Is tipping some sort of game of psychological warfare?"

His tipping post actually has two parts. In the first, Richard discussed a New York Times article about a San Diego restaurant owner who banned tips in favor of an 18% service charge -- just under the average tip. That charge is shared by employees, including the often-overlooked kitchen staff. (It's also fully taxed, unlike a tip.)

There's a lot of money involved in tipping, a custom long ago imported to the U.S. from Europe, where it's no longer the norm. The NYT article says:

Each year, according to the economist Ofer Azar, diners hand over some $42 billion in tips at the nation's full-service restaurants, which employ 2.6 million waiters, most of whom rely on tips for the bulk of their incomes.

Richard prefers tipping to a service charge (some of his readers wondered why restaurants don't simply pay all employees a decent wage), and, for his second post, did additional research about waiter tactics.

Among them: upselling, smiling, crouching next to the table, putting a "thank you" or smiley face on the check, touching the customer and telling a joke.

He said, "With the exception of upselling, I think most of these strategies are perfectly fair game, and I'll probably continue to respond to them on some level."

Several readers who've worked in the trade confirmed the accuracy of his observations. "Celticbuffy" said, "As a server off and on for the last 20 years I can attest that these really do work. As for upselling, I hate doing it but it works about half of the time. It can be as simple as 'Did you save any room for our scrumptious apple crisp?'"

Comments

 

This is stupid. There is no way in hell a server should make 20% even if they only get tips and only have $100 in tables an hour – that’s a low estimate at 10% they get $10 an hour. That’s seems like a $10 an hour job, need more? Do more. There is no way wait staff deserve 20% of bills.

Thank about it it seems pretty easy to drop $500 in what 10 $50 tables an hour does that merit $100 an hour?

Do you make that? Even half that,  hell a quarter of that is $52,000 a year.

Just a quick clarification, the article states that the 18% service charge is taxed, unlike a tip.  This may vary state to state, but tips are taxed as income, both federally and state.  It is normally based on what the server declares as their tips, but that number is balanced by a percentage based on the total restaurant sales.  Therefore, if the restaurants sales are high, but the servers are not declaring enough in tips, there will be "allocated tips" which will be money deducted from the servers paychecks....all of the servers checks, equally, in order to make up the difference.  If it was all free money, I would still be waiting tables.

Ahhhh, "The Sea of Mediocrity", service in the United States. People don't get it and feel they are so much better and deserving of a higher paying job rather then the one they have. This feeling or attitude is blanketing this country and that doesn't deserve 20 %!!

The correct approach for a diner is to expect good service and be ready, willing and able to tip well when you get it. The difference between 15% and 20% on a $100 dinner bill is $5. Whoo hoo. Less than what it cost you to park in a major city and not much more than your coffee will be the next day. It should be a natural.

By engaging the server initially you set the expectation for them to engage you as well. If you as the customer are comfortable with the situation you'll make your server comfortable, and attentive. Professionals or not they are people too, subject to the same interaction dynamics as the rest of us. Gently and gracefully take charge of your own dining experience and you will have an engaged, attentive server looking after you. Show your date respect at the table in front of your server and they will (should) clue in to the need to treat both of you well. If you're really charming dessert just might be on the house. Bottom line, you get what you give. Nose in the air? Your server will go elsewhere.

I have spent the last three years working as a server and trying to provide for my children while attending college full-time.  I went through a nasty divorce after spending years at home taking care of the kids so he could further his career and got just enough child support to buy groceries.  I won't sugar coat it, living off of a server's pay is NOT easy.  I am appalled that people can come into a restaurant, eat a good meal, not have to clean anything up, leave me a lousy $2 tip off of a $50+ bill and think that I'll be appreciative of it.  

I'm not ashamed to say that I've used the tactics described.  I always sign the guests' checks with a smiley face and a big thank you.  Upselling is a word that I use often.  I want my guests to buy top shelf alcohol and get appetizers and desserts.  It makes the check bigger and usually increases the tip.  

This ploy isn't a new thing.  Go to a car dealership and the salesperson will try to get you into a car with more bells and whistles.  Buy a new washer and dryer lately?  I bet you upgraded because someone knew how to sell it to you.  Alot of people live off of commissions and that's exactly what tips are and servers have to live off of those commissions.  

I only make $3.50 an hour from my company.  By the time I get my paycheck, it's not worth the paper that it was printed on.  I have to pay taxes on every single bit of tips that I claimed for the week, not to mention the meager insurance my company allows us to purchase.  There are some weeks that I actually have to claim alot more in tip money than I actually make!  I also must tip out the hostess, who makes minimum wage, the bartender, food runner, and busboy, who all make more than me an hour.  It's really not fair, but as a single parent trying to finish up college so I can better mine and my childrens' lives, it's the only choice I have.  

I will continue to thank each guest the way that I have in the past, to spend that extra time making sure that the kids are amused, and ensuring that every person that sits at my table has the most pleasurable experience they can have.  I just hope that more people realize that tips should be included when you plan to go out to eat.      

The most effective way I have found to get very good service is to figure out what I am ordering, add it all up in my head, then figure %20 tip.  I pull out my wallet, place the cash on the table between the salt shakers, and when the waitstaff comes to order they see it.  They want to take it assuming it was from a previous customer, but I stop them and say, "That's your tip from me, I am ready to order."  I get the BEST SERVICE that way.  The reason I do this?  Tip is an acronym for "To Insure Promptness."  Why give insurance AFTER the meal?  To "tip someone off" to a good deal, is to tell/pay them first.

I think the author of this article is insecure!  Just because your waitstaff smiles and has conversation with you doesnt mean theyre  only trying to get a bigger tip.  I have waited tables for awhile now as a second job and I will tell you I love to interact and be nice to my tables because I AM A NICE PERSON and why would I want to be a drag at work, it makes my job a little more fun when you CAN HAVE FUN.  You have to know what tables arent in the mood for small talk and which ones are, because you dont want to bother people either.  A group of women are usually the worst tippers because they always have seperate checks and never seem to tip more than a few bucks, and they also sit at your table and talk for 2 hours, so were not turning those tables, which means we are LOSING money.  IF YOUR GOING TO SIT AT THE TABLE FOR ANOTHER HOUR AFTER YOU PAY you should tip more or go home.  A group of men are the best because one of them always picks up the whole tab, they tip well and they dont stick around to gossip for hours on end.  

When my husband was stationed overseas for 2 years, I used to take our then 4-6 year old out to Outback almost every week just so I could teach him good table manners. We would get there around 4:30 to beat the crowd and it was quieter so we wouldn't bother any other dinners while he was learning. While we worked on reading a book quietly or coloring, the staff almost always came over to thank me for taking the time to teach him to be good in a restaurant during non peak times.

I felt tipping 20 plus percent was justified because they went out of the way to bring things exactly as I wanted them, quickly before my son got bored, we came, we ate & we left.

I have waited tables & it's tough. I remember what it's like to hustle your butt off & get stiffed, not to mention cleaning up after someone else's rotton little kid who HADN'T been taught to be good in a public place.

I have also been to London (& Europe) & the Bahamas where the 15-18% gratuity was built in & there is NO incentive for the staff to move quickly or to be pleasant. Service is just that, bare bones service. I'm a capitalist, give me greed anyday.

I usually give a very generous tip when the waitress leans over the table and sticks her Boob in my ear. Ooo-la-la.....

Tips should be done away with and the restaurant should be pay a decent wage.  Everybody knows that the waiter/waitress can't control everything, yet they are the ones that get blamed by via a lousy tip. I believe the "tip" was invented as a way of rewarding superior service, not as part of the service.

That being said, I have had numerouse occasions where I have had to wait on a refill or for extra napkins and have had to flag down my waiter/waitress.  Yet, it is assumed that I will still be leaving a tip???  If I get poor service, I leave a small tip and a quick note on the bill as to WHY the tip was small.  If the restaruant just thinks your cheap, the poor service will never be resolved.

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