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Dining dilemma: How do you split the check?

Posted Jul 18 2008, 04:09 PM by Karen Datko
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Mike at Clever Dude recently faced one of those "does this make me look cheap?" moments. He and Stacie were part of a group of 11 honoring a departing colleague with dinner. Mike and Stacie split a veggie main course after everyone shared appetizers, and they drank water. Others had meat dishes and drinks.

When it was time to pay, the others decided the bill should be split evenly, which would cost Mike and Stacie a lot more than the price of their actual meals. What do you do when you're faced with that situation?

This question pops up in everyone's life. Why should you pay for other people's splurges when you opted to keep your own costs down? Would that be fair?

Mike figured he and Stacie actually owed a combined total of $24, including tax, tip and their share of the honored guest's meal. But if the bill was split evenly among the 11 who were paying (they were treating the guest), Mike and Stacie would have had to pay $49.

Here are some options:

    • Pay the entire, possibly budget-busting $49.

    • Ask for separate checks -- which is not always possible and is bound to tick off the waiter.

    • Pay just what you owe, and forget about whether your colleagues think you're a cheapskate.

    Mike tossed in $27 and offered more, but the shy guy collecting the money declined and made up the difference. Ouch. Mike wrote: "Think I'm cheap? Think I'm a hero? Think I'm an absolutely normal, boring guy?" Oh, no, Mike. Never boring.

    Of course, his readers had something to say. "I think you did the right thing by taking the middle ground. Too bad that one person absorbed the cost though. Everyone should have paid what they owed, not the even split," Momma said.

    Some readers told about other awkward restaurant situations. Karen said, "Some acquaintances are horrible tippers and sometimes they look at what they think the total should be with a tiny tip and subtract what we gave them, so they pay less and part of our tip goes toward their meal." How rude.

    Alex suggested that Mike and Stacie should have ordered two main courses and taken the leftovers home. "Then you wouldn't have looked so cheap, and the guy collecting the money wouldn't have had to put more in. Nor would he tell his co-workers what a tightwad you were behind your back."

    Comments

     

    Thoughtless people who order large and then pay small, expecting others who order moderately to make up their difference, are rude and immature.Try to never llet this happen to you with the same people twice.

    When out with friends we get one check and then send it around the table so everyone can put their money in.  This way everyone has the chance to figure out what they owe and put the appropriate amount in.  Sometimes it does come up short due to the cheapskate who forgot to factor in tip/taxes but typically it is small enough that someone throws in a couple of bucks to cover the difference.  

    If you know that you cannot afford to split the check equally then you should tactfully decline going to the dinner event and avoid the potentialy embarassing situation all together

    Just a quick thought.  In most cases, with the exception of when everyone is paying for a third person's meal, it is just as easy for the waiter to split the check as it is to bring out one since they type it all up into the computer anyway.  If it will be a problem for the server, generally they will ask in advance if you want them to divide the bill.

    Ok, I think that people have a right to go out with their friends and have a good time. However, in this situation you make sure up front how this is going to be handled. Everyone has the right to eat or drink what they want. I have a drink , I pay for my drink. I do not ask other people to pay for something they did not have. It is not a question of being cheep, it is the simple fact that everyone one has differant incomes, bills, likes, and dislikes. I think his friends were being really crappy to him and the guy who payed his share needs to get a spine. Treat people fairly just like you want to be treated fairly and no-one has a problem. Right? Right!

    Not everybody can afford  to go all out on big dinners. Some of us are a little tight on money or have other priorities, but that dosent mean i  should be excluded  out of the event either. why should i not go out to have a good time coversing with friends because i cant afford to pay for someone elses splurges. i guess i would just have to ask for a seperate check to start with.

    hey what is all the fuzz ! I am with you Mike if you got it go and spend if not don't get your pants in hot waters by beaing cheap !!!!!!

    simple...pay for what you ordered~~ duh!!!

     Youth today !!  you are "dining out "not eating out and dining is an experience therefore if you can't get separate checks you split the bill evenly or you chose not to go out and dine with these people, it is about the company and fellowship and you pay evenly for the experince, or order more or don't go out  as often -if you can't afford it . This is the responsible thing to do BUDGET

    I used to be a server for many years.  To me the hassle of separating checks was well worth it.  It showed who the better tippers were and I knew I got all of my tip.  When there is a person who offers to collect cash, almost always the server loses much of the intended tip.  Ther person who takes the cash and puts the bil on their credit card usually profits and leaves a poor tip in my experience.  I've left a good tip while pitching in and in the end the server got less than my tip after everyone chipped in.   I know a lot of servers hate splitting checks.  They just need to know in advance and don't move seats!  

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