Whoever said after the engagement is way off!  You should diiscolse when it becomes serious and you start living like a long term couple and forsee marriage with real potential.

I think if you are discussing marriage, then it's time for financial disclosure, good or bad.  Prior to that point, I don't think it's really anyone's business.

Having been through a marriage to a con man who talked sweet but delivered nothing I would have to say "buyer beware". Its not only how much money one has but the debts that are accumulated. Make sure you both go in with the same debt and figure out how your going to take care of it together before you buy into the marriage. Put it in the prenup if you have to.

Its entirely up to the individual with the money when they should disclose information about their finances.  I dated my wife for 3 years before we got engaged, and had absolutely no idea that she was worth millions.  

Living in NYC it is not always ease to tell who is rich and who is living the rich life financed by debt.  My wife did not live the high life.  She had no problems spending the weekends in my 1 bedroom apt in Queens and taking the subway to get around town.  I cooked alot at home and when we went out to eat alot of times we split the bill.  I couldnt afford alot becasue I made the decision to quit my job while going back to school for my masters.  She didn't complain about us not being able to vacation like some of her friends.  Her parents dont live in NYC and even though they are retired they are not well off.  My wife made her money as a partner in a construction firm her cousin started and in her job as an investment banker.

After I graduated with my masters, I wanted to start my own consulting firm, but I also wanted to get married.  I decided that I wanted to get married more than I wanted my to start my own business.  I got a well paying job so I can pull my own weight and we got engaged. We lived together for 1 year before getting married but I still did not know just how rich my wife was.  I knew she did well, very well but I did not know just how well.  About 7 months after we got married, my wife and I took a trip to Trinidad (i'm orginally from trinidad) and 2 days before we left 2 told me that if I wanted to I could qiut my job and start my own company.  I thought it was nice of her to say but I didnt think it was possible, we had just started looking for a condo.

It was then, almost 5 years from the time of our first date that my wife told me about her finances.  At first I left a bit betrayed, did she not trust me? if she loved me, why didn't she help me?  I talked to her about how I felt and ultimately the fact that she married me and didn't even ask my to sigh a pre-nup was enough to convinve me that she did trust me and that trust is something that takes time to develop/earn.

I am a financial advisor whio dated a woman several times two years ago.  I was definitely interested in her, but she started to raise the possibility of my managing her assets, which, it later turned out, were substantial.  Normally, I would not want to turn down business, but in this case I suggested she hold off on any decision until we dated more.  The next time out she told me she was seeing someone else but wanted to hire me as her advisor.  I was disappointed, but she has remained an excellent client and done well by me.  She is still seeing the other guy!

"Anyway, if they go to each others home, then the cat would be out of the bag. So, in that respect, it would have to be soon"

Not neccessarily.  I am "from money" my husband is not.  We don't have to worry where the rent money is going to come from or food or any bill money.  My husband works, I work and our children go to a normal elementary school.  We have a modest 1200 sqft 3bedroom 2 bath apartment.  We only own one car...a minivan.  There are no bigscreen plasma TV's or expensive cars or anything that flags us down as "having money".  Heck, our wedding bands and engagement ring was modest and our wedding was a small wedding that cost the same as an average wedding.  Not all people who have money flaunt it in their apartments, homes, cars, etc.  

The only thing my children have that normal children don't have is their college paid for, and THAT was a gift from my great-grandparents!

I prefer to keep my wealth status undercover until I have a sense of what the other person is looking for.  I find that people that do not have money tend to talk considerable about what they would purchase if they had it.  That is usually a clue for me to move on since I know I would have a problem living with someone whom is constantly thinking about what they would do if they had money.  My conversations about money would start with expressing my concerns about people not saving for retirement (401k, 457, 403(b), roth IRA)) and how happy I am about not having credit card debt. After that, I should have a feel about the person's attitude regarding money and would proceed accordingly.

Your mother told you woman to find a wealthy man and you have it solved, So its about time men got a bit back. What about all these woman that drive the flash cars that there sugar dads supply. Come guys time to even the ledger.

I agree with the poster.  After the engagement but before the wedding.  however, on the other hand, I have been burned by guys intimidated by my profession.  Either thnking 'Here's the money.' or 'Too smart for my blood.'  Shame too.  When you meet someone that you wouod llike to get to know better, that a job or financial position would make that impossible.

The poster may be surprised that the sugar mama response isnt all they get.  They may run into guys who are too intimidated and keep their idea of their manhood wrapped up0 in the ability to be the breadwinner.

Waiting until after engagement is dumb, and also dishonest. Even though you can still back out, engagement is supposed to be the point of full committment. How much you share is going to vary depending on lots of factors, but the broad outline needs to be in place. Each needs to know the financial tendencies of the other, and some rough idea of their net worth. Hell, I'm not sure a full credit report wouldn't be a good idea.