I paid for my own undergrad and now masters degrees but had significant help via employer tuition assistance. I highly recommend this method because it makes you feel that you are indeed paying for the education yourself. I am very successful as a result of the degrees and virtually debt free. I paid for my son's college education and he chose two industries, both of which imploded: IT and mortgage banking. I feel I jinxed him by paying his way. I resented the fact that my parents did not help me pay tuition; now I wish they were alive so I could thank them profusely.

I hope all these old folks that wouldn't help their kids out when they could have save

up all that extra money for the nursing home---I can see it now when they dont have

enough money to make ends meet and try to ask the kids for some--I know what I

would say to them--Tough Love Baby--Tough Love

It isn't how much money you have or owe and doesn't just apply to college.  It appies to life,  work ethic and how you manage the money you have and how much you keep out of what you have.  My children each had there first checking account and savings account at 14 of their own to deposit  there 10 hour a week summer paycheck into.  Half into checking and half into savings  to spend on something special.  They had an account to cash there check without cost and learned all about checking accounts, debit cards , and balancing checkbooks.   I paid for everything my kids wanted, they were spoiled from the day they were born,   twins, but 2 cars, until they graduated from high school.    Now they pay there retirement fund first, a living expense account, and then the special account for the next thing they want.  At 24, they don't have a college education, but there retirement account is large, average job, nice houses, new trucks, men toys, extra land, and are very happy with very little debt and no charge cards.   And they have never ask me for any money since the day they graduated from high school.   I have friends whose children are as old as 40 with much better jobs than their parents who are still asking for money.    The college money I saved for them is in their names and they have to count it on there income tax each year and but leave it there for retirement.  So my advice, from my opinion is to teach your children about money, prepare them for life, regardless of college, income, live style etc.   I give credit to their money management skills to the young age of check books and savings, because I am not a good  role model.  I have always worked, paid bills first, but I am a spender.  If I want it, I buy it.  

Kids can get college loans cheaper than parents can.  Once Jhonny or Susie successfully graduates from college, then see how much they owe and help them pay some of it off.  If they quit, I say it's on them.  

I agree that it is in the way one conduct parenting. How you mentally prepare your kids to success. My parents were prepared to pay for my college then, but I wanted to get a scholarship and ended up getting one. After that, I entered law school while working at the same time. Eventually I got my degree and pass the bar. This is all pain and hard work but I proved to myself that I can pull it off with a minimal financial help from my parents.

I think that the point of this article isn't that all kids with loaded parents are brats.... but many of those kids who's parents pay for everything, lack the exposure and experience of dealing with realistic circumstances.... there's weaning, and there's the never ending bottle. I say if your kids don't know the difference between wants and needs by the time they get to college, GAME OVER.

coozoe, no one can predict with certainty which industries will do well or not. Just because IT and mortgage banking suffered does not mean we have ZERO need for those people. I think that anyone paying for their child to get a history degree without a clearly defined career path (teaching, steeping stone to med or law school etc.) is nuts, and I definitely am biased towards the hard sciences/engineering since that's how I make a great living (chemical engineering). But your child would have had difficulty in those industries whether you paid their way or they found their own way, I guess that means you regret them going to college at all then!

The idea that a parent owes their child a college education starts a young adult out in life beleiving in entitlements.  It's one thing to give your children a helping hand when they understand that you are willing to sacrafice for them and how hard you have worked in life to get the money that you give them, it's a completely differant thing when they feel you owe it to them.  Most children see the way we live now after 30 years of hard work and suffering, we have a good life, possibly even a life that seems above average, but they don't know what you had to do to get there and that the money you give them now comes from the total sacrafice you have made in life.  Give\ing your children the perspective to understand this is more important then the amount of money you give them.

What I told my children (I have 3 handsome boys) was that I will pay all three of them equally for their education with what I can afford. The rest they will have to come up with (work or loans). If I don’t pay them now I will be saving the money and in the end it will all go to them. In the mean time they build up all these loans that they have to pay back with interest. They will be paying back all that with the money they are going to inherit. It will not be a good use of my money, if they are using it to pay off the accumulated interest. I also believe that their career choice will suffer if they are forced to work and earn a living (a noble idea!) while they are in school. It will also be best for then and me if they finish school as fast as they can and start earning.

I'm currently going to college at the University of Dayton.  Never in my life have I EVER seen so many spoiled brats... but it's not because their parents mostly all pay for college, it's because they were raised that they're the most important thing in the world and they can have anything they want.  My parents won't help me with school because I'm a female going into the engineering field.  At one point, I had a full-time job, part-time job, and full-time classes all at the same time.  I had time in the day for about 6 hours of sleep and maybe an hour of study time if I was lucky.  For ENGINEERING...  I have 45,000 in student loans already because all of the scholarships in college go to either the "minorities" or "athletes".  I had a 3.7 GPA in high school and a 34 on my ACT and only got an $8,000 scholarship.  My college GPA?  Yeah, it's a 1.26.  And I'm STILL going to graduate up to my eyeballs with debt that will never go away, not even in bankruptcy.  You really want to put your kids through that?  Kids are usually a reflection of their parents, regardless of how much they pay for school.  And if you wouldn't want to relive that for yourself, why would you want to make your children go through that?  I'm not going to get to graduate until 2011, instead of 2009 like I should because I have NO time for anything but work and have to retake a few courses.  Please, don't do this to your children.  Make them work for their "fun" money, sure, but not for tuition, especially not at any reputable school.  Especially when a college diploma is as necessary now as a high school one was 30 years ago...  Soon you'll need a PH.D to work at McDonalds.