I think that giving an experience instead of stuff is a great idea and I agree with this entry a great deal. This year I am trying to do that a lot more and have put "experiences" on my Christmas want list.....one thing on my want list is a donation to Habitat for Humanity in my name and also I have asked for gift cards for theatre movies and movie rental business.  My big gift to my spouse this year is a certificate for her manicurist so she can get her nails done several times at no cost to her.  We need to think more of how much we waste in our country.   Moe in midwest

Hilarious/Hideous Christmas - My family varies hugely when it comes to financial capabilities for Christmas spending... We've got the aunt who buys for everyone, as she's very well off and her bank account is always booming... Then we've got my cousin who is the queen of finding great deals on expensive things.... We've got the moderate ones, such as my immediate household; who plan ahead, shop early and stick to a moderate budget.... and finally, we have family members who are barely surviving every day living expenses from week to week, before the painful Christmas woes of shopping. It's quite a mix! A few of our family members decided to solve the problem of embarassment and financial stresses at Christmas  by focussing on what is truly important to us - Getting the whole family together for a joyous reunion of happiness, laughter and bonding - without the crazy expensive SPENDING!!

Here's what they came up with (and it worked like a charm last year and we are all HAPPILY looking forward to it this year!) First of all - every family buys gifts for ONLY the members of their household. For example: We are a family of 4; my husband and I and we have 2 boys. We only exchange gifts on Christmas morning with each other. That eliminates a HUGE financial burdon that follows us clearly through the spring in credit card payments, etc. We shop early and finish early and can focus on bill payments and other expenses in December, as opposed to last minute shopping sprees for an uncle or a cousin we may have forgotten.

Next, we plan the big Christmas family meal. The meal is usually held at Gramma's house and several of the happy cooks (those who enjoy cooking) will volunteer to cook various dishes (Gramma makes the turkey, Aunt Susan does the stuffing and cranberries, Uncle Tim makes his Pineapple Upside Down Cake, etc. etc.) We all show up for and enjoy; the awesome meal together.

Next - (Here comes the fun part!) Everyone pays $1 per person in their house (optional). It goes into a jar that sits on the coffee table (or anywhere). We are a family of 4, so we donate $4 to the jar. By the time everyone pays their $1/family member, there's between $40 - $65 in the pot.

The contents of the pot are given to the person who wins it at the end of the night. How do you win?

YOU provide the most hideous gift to another family member! We have previously drawn names.... and we must each FIND (not buy) an awful, tacky, ugly, ridiculously stupid item from within our own homes (a punch bowl with a huge crack in it, an empty (used up) perfume bottle, a broken or hand-painted picture frame, an old curling iron (for Uncle Pete who is completely BALD), a false teeth container that has been decorated to match bathroom decor, a coffee mug with an inappropriate saying on it (Happy 75th birthday - given to your 19 year old nephew), an old ashtray you made in highschool modelling class, a knitted pair of socks Mom started making 5 years ago and never finished, a 7 year old calendar, a pretty container of bath beads with only one or two beads left in it, a head from a broken old barbie doll (for Grampa), 8-trak tapes for my 16 year old, an old skipping rope with knots in it for my Dad, etc. etc. etc.

I think you get the picture here.... The ideas & creativities go on and on and on!

The results and benefits of this are almost endless! Let me point out a few of the obvious BENEFITS:

1.) It completely emliminates the need to hold onto receipts for EXCHANGES.

2.) It saves the costs of Christmas Shopping as all items must come from your home.

3.) The laughter and good times it creates builds funny and awesome memories!!

4.) Everyone participates on the same cost effective level, without breaking the bank

5.) The meal and togetherness has special focus over the gift exchanges (Exactly as Christmas SHOULD be - you've got to admit and agree to that!)

6.) It's a great way to get inspired to clean out closets/cupboards in search of the perfectly hideous gift that it's about time we part with, without just 'tossing it out!'

7.) Instead of searching desperately for the PERFECT gift (causing STRESS), it's the complete opposite!

8.) Every family member can easily participate. (Buying a gift is breaking the rules!)

9.) There's no harm in telling someone that you DON'T like the gift you received. In fact, that only HELPS the gift-giver to win that jar of "dollars"!

10.) At the end of the gift exchange - and all of the good times, happiness and laughter, there must be a vote to find the winner. The winner is the person who came up with and GAVE (not the person who 'received' it)  the BEST "MOST HIDEOUS" or HILARIOUSLY FUNNY/INAPPROPRIATE GIFT TO GIVE. The person with the most votes, wins the little jar of dollars! It's a small prize but it's FUN! (If you want to make the stakes a bit higher and the efforts more appealing, you could make it a $5/family member donation to the jar (if you feel everyone can afford that amount, which is still cheaper than shopping for gifts, really. Another idea is to allow "blind donations" where no one else knows the amount you are placing in the jar. You can give a nickel or a $50 or anything in between for the donation. Another spin is NO JAR AT ALL. You play for bragging rights only... There are many alternatives. The main thing is the spirit of Christmas in your heart and spending precious time with the ones you love).

Christmas needs to be FUN! It needs to be a time for FAMILIES to share in joy together. No one wants to feel left out or embarassed due to financial strains, etc.

For the one day, have the meal together, do the silly gift exchange and create the wonderful memories. It's sooooo worth it in the end!  :)

Sure - go ahead and spend a fortune if you want or feel you need to - BUT - keep it minmized to YOUR OWN home and your immediate 'in house' family, with the exception of your parents and God-child of course. Make those arrangements clear and known well in advance of the big day. Still, do those exchanges but do them discretely (and NOT at the big family get together) without making a cause for obligation to others for an exchange gesture. To be honest, exchanging gifts isn't even necessary. In the end, it can easily get out of control by forgetting to buy for this one or that one or this one or that one, etc. etc... and before you know it, you've spent your way, right into spring of the next year, struggling all the way. Keep it simple. It's easy to NOT forget to buy for ANYONE on your list, if you eliminate the list altogether and vow to make this year a FUN year with many wonderful memories created, good food, good laughs, good photos and great visiting! Gifts aren't the main focus. Prove that to yourself and to your family by eliminating the concept - or at least giving it a fun and economical spin (as described in this) with a "Hilarious/Hideous Christmas!"

Enjoy the holidays

         &

Merry Christmas!   :)

My husband and I have to live on less than $13,000 a year and he works 2 jobs 6 days a week.  I very often make all of my own greeting cards with my computer, some saved ribbons, do-dads, glitter, and other such things.  I don't throw stuff like that out.  On at least more than 1 occasion, I have made all my Christmas gifts for family and friends and they really appreciate the effort, time and thought I put into making them.  I shopped all the local thrift stores this year, and found brand new usable gifts for everyone on my list and it all cost me less than $100. for 15 people.

I also offer myself throughout the year for housecleaning, gardening, dog sitting, things like that. People can find ways to cut costs, recycle, and regift without spending lots of dollars at fancy stores.  Most people find that its much easier and less of a hassle just to go spend money for gifts, they are lazy, unimaginative or just too spoiled by commercialism.  NOT ME!

I agree! Even as a kid, on a very limited babysitting salary, I hand made gift cards for family members. This is a great idea to introduce our own children to. Yes, it saves on packaging etc, but even more important it sends the real message of the holidays: Time and energy spent on loved ones is the best gift. I watched my parents go into debt every Christmas as a kid. Opening up those gifts was not very enjoyable. It is a challenge to me to find ways to help friends & family with what they really need like a day off from kids, or a room painted. I just wish someone would do the same for me. Lord knows I don't need anymore Bodyshop cream or candles! Kim in Calgary

One year, when my children were 8 and 9, my mother sent a small gift and made a charitable doantion in their name. She bought Llamas, rabbits and chickens for families in South America. She started a trend that we still observe 10 years later. We have adopted different families, organized food drives for our local food bank and we organized a book drive for a local center dedicated to educating  teen mothers. We are not wealthy. I was a single mother for 15 years and we didn't have generous amounts of extra cash but we found  a way to pay it forward. Thanks Mom!!

Yes,these is a cleaver article.thanks

I love the idea of giving of your own time and talents.  Just be sure to follow through with the promise and give it your all.  If you are already stretched to the limit for time, don't make a promise  that you may or may not find time to honor, or that will cause you additional stress in your life.  Gift giving should be from the heart and a joy for both giver and receiver.

Here's another idea for giving that I know I would love to be on the receiving end of...a complete carwash, inside and out.  Being a busy mother, wife, employee, friend, chauffer, etc...my car stays in a mess, and I find very little time to get it cleaned properly.  This type gift would mean more to me than a jillion movie passes.

Just a thought for giving to the ones you love through out the year... leave notes in unexpected places, just to say hello and/or "I love you".  What a great way to let someone know they are worth your time and effort.  My husband has left me notes on my car rear-view mirror...literally...written with little alphabet stickers...the more unexpected the place, the better.

Enjoy giving to the ones you love and care about!  Merry CHRISTmas.

I would much rather have a gift of experience than something I have to closet for at least five years before throwing it away, because it is something I absolutely don't need or have five more of.  

My elderly aunts and uncle have specifically told me that they don't want anything.  So, for the past few years, I've donated to the Los Angeles Regional Food Bank.  Most people that I know are drowning in "stuff" so I've taken to increasing my donation and including them in the mix.  People are so happy that they don't have to find a place for the donation.  Donations don't clash with their furniture, don't spoil, always fit perfectly  and don't need to be walked.  It's sort of like good karma distribution.  

Good article, especially like the idea about Heifer International... intend to get that one right off in the mail today!

However, the coupon  idea is a BAD one, "however charming and cheap they are to give.   It's a present of a promise of service:  twenty nights of baby sitting , or eleven certificates for pruning your hedge.

The reason they are cheap is that both donor and recipient know they are not collectable.  Just wait until that muggy day when your dear friend lets you know that his hedge needs trimming."  ...Miss Manners from the 'Guide to Excruciating Correct Behavior'.      

I plan to give cookies, bottles of wine and... diamonds!